Sunday afternoon Darla wasn't feeling well. She came into the kitchen to say something and suddenly she was throwing up...everywhere. As S. grabbed a bowl and I grabbed her, our eyes met over her head in a big, silent "Uh-oh."
Monday as she perked up, S. went down. Then by 4am Wed morning it was my turn. Our plan had been to leave this morning for Long Beach, WA to spend Thanksgiving with S.'s dad and sister. Unfortunately, as I was finally able to eat a piece of toast last night, S. relapsed into another round of sick.
So here we are. I've attempted to keep the kids semi-quiet so S. can sleep. It's challenging to keep the healthy ones busy while we're in the house and experiencing "record lows" in temperature for this time of year. 20 degrees and windy isn't exactly "go outside and play" weather. It would be cozy if we weren't all trying to keep germs off each other. Everyone to their own corners! I didn't plan on having Thanksgiving at home so if we do end up staying put tomorrow I have cranberry sauce and 7up for dinner.
As I stared at my bedroom wall for hours on end yesterday I did some thinking. (At one point S. came in, took one look at me and said, "Have you had too much time to sit and think today?" I guess he knows that look on my face.)
I thought a lot about holding things loosely.
One of ironies of my life recently (there are actually many) happened when we took our house of the market. We have wanted to sell but were beginning to feel exhausted with the roller coaster that it entailed. With everything in our lives feeling up in the air, we decided that letting the listing run out would at least eliminate one unknown.
Two weeks after it was off the market I got a message from an acquaintance saying she had been interested but saw it wasn't listed anymore.
One more time! We cleaned and showed it to them.
Then we didn't hear anything.
"Okay, Lord. I get it. I need to continue being open handed about everything- even if it is a roller coaster."
Then this week a neighbor stopped by. "I have a friend who might be interested in your house but I see it's not listed anymore."
Are you kidding?!
I suppressed a smile and said, "If they want I can show it to them."
"They'll be in town in a few weeks. I might let you know."
Then another message from the first girl, "We're still interested...just still looking at some other places right now."
I have concluded that whether I want it to be or not- my life is a roller coaster. Every time I think there is something I can control to regain some sanity...I can't. I am reminded that sanity does not come from me controlling my circumstances. "O Lord, I know the way of man is not in himself; It is not in man who walks to direct his own steps." Jeremiah 10:23
As I stared at my bedroom wall I realized that our Thanksgiving is yet another example. I would much rather be driving to the beach, coffee in hand, good music on and fun conversation with S. Instead, I'm trying to plan yet another meal that is gentle on stomachs (and noses) for the "sickies" and nutritious enough for the "healthies".
At least cranberry sauce is me and Darla's favorite part of Thanksgiving dinner. Come to think of it, I do have all the fixings for S.'s favorite lemon meringue pie. And I guess I can't complain too much...how many people can say they lost weight on Thanksgiving?